The Spirit of God

My little girl was due for her shots this last week. Every time I thought of taking her to get her shots, I felt nauseous. I tried to convince myself I just didn't like that she cried when she was poked. The day before her doctor's appointment, the missionaries even stopped by to give her a blessing to calm my nerves, but the feeling wouldn't leave. When we got to the doctor, I allowed them to give her almost all of the shots until the nurse go to the MMR vaccine. At that point I felt dizzy to the point of fainting. Something just felt wrong. I told the nurse that we were going to wait on that particular vaccine and we went home with me thinking I was totally crazy. I even called to schedule another appointment when we got home because I thought my nerves were just being too jumpy.

Today, I took my little girl to the allergist for her peanut allergy. The doctor suggested we test her for the typical childhood allergies. After they did the scratch test (they make little scratches on their arms and expose them to allergens to see what they are allergic to,) the nurse came in to check her arms. Her mouth dropped open and she immediately demanded if I have given my child the MMR vaccine. With no logical explanation as to why I didn't, I told her it just didn't feel right. She told me that my listening to my mother's intuition I had probably saved my child's life. She is extremely allergic to eggs and the MMR is an egg-based vaccine.

I know that it had nothing to do with mother's intuition and everything to do with the fact that God was watching out for me and my little girl. I am so grateful that the feelings were persistent even though I tried to shake them off and that in the end everything turned out OK. I have been reminded today that God is watching out for all of us and that he communicates to us through the spirit.

Our eternal family

I have always wanted to accomplish great things in my life. I was the kid with a goal list reaching across the continents. When my little Sofie was born a little over a year ago, I decided to stay home. It was great and I loved it. We lived with my parents for awhile why my husband was on the job search so there was always something to do, always someone to be around. Then we moved 2,000 miles away.

In the last few months of my life and the first time of doing the mom thing on my own, I have felt worthless, like I was accomplishing nothing I wanted to in my life. After listening to Sofie scream for the 5th or 6th day all day in a row, a couple of weeks ago, I was done. I told my husband that I was going to seek out a studio and go back to work full time as a photographer. He suggested I pray about it. I didn't have to.

I know with my whole heart that at home is where the Lord wants me to be. That spending time with Sofie is exactly what I am supposed to be doing. Family is the most important thing in the whole world. I get to have Sofie forever, which I am grateful for, but she won't be a child for ever and I need to focus on her so I don't miss it.

Forever Families

I have two friends who have recently lost their fathers unexpectedly. One of them also lost his brother and sister in a car accident three and a half years ago. I used to shun all thoughts of losing anyone in my family- I couldn't even think about losing my husband or my son without freaking out. But, with so much death happening around me, I have realized what a fragile, precious gift life is and that it can be taken away at any moment. I have gained a much greater appreciation for my knowledge that families are can be together forever. My testimony of that knowledge has also been strengthened by those who have experienced these tragedies and have been able to go on living because they have a knowledge that their family will be together again someday. I know that I would be absolutely devastated if my family was temporarily separated, but I am immeasurable comforted by the fact that I have been sealed to my family for eternity and I know that if I live right, I get to be with them forever. "This doctrine brings a brightness of hope into an otherwise dark and dreary world." (Elder Robert D. Hales, "The Eternal Family")

Greatest Dad in the Universe

As a father it is hard to imagine anything better than hearing, "Thanks Dad; you're the greatest dad in the universe!" I recently heard that phrase from my daughter after performing the incredible task of getting her some cheese, crackers and lunch meat.

That got me thinking about how I need to tell my Heavenly Father much more frequently how wonderful a father he is to me, and not just when big things happen in my life, but for all the amazing "cheese and cracker" blessings I get each day.

My son was feeling a little sick today, so he went home from church earlier than my daughter. Not forgetting about her sick little brother my daughter made sure to collect some extra candy from her class, and the Bishop, to bring home. She then proceeded to come home and hide the candy in my son's new toy workbench so he would find it when he woke up from his nap. She also made sure that the candy she gave to her brother was bigger than her own because, "that will make him feel better".

While hearing that I'm the greatest dad is hard to top, seeing my daughter serve my son without any prompting from me is actually better. I imagine that our Heavenly Father feels the same way. I'm sure he smiles when we worship him and when we talk about his greatness. But also imagine that he smiles a little bit wider when we not only worship him, but take care of one another as well, just as brothers and sisters should.

My Medical Miracle

Swine flu, seasonal flu, pneumonia, bronchitis, strep throat, RSV, colds, colds, and colds. This is only a partial list of the many sicknesses that have been in our neighborhood since my baby was born. When we found out the good news that we were expecting and after some 9-month calculations, her due date in late August made me very nervous. A newborn at the beginning of fall was going to be so difficult to keep healthy and as everyone knows these "little" sicknesses in adults are very, very not little problems for tiny babies. So I prayed.

Everyday since my baby was born I have said prayers asking for her to stay healthy. Recently after she was born I was given a new calling and was subsequently set apart for my new responsibility by a priesthood holder in our congregation. In this priesthood blessing counsel was given and the blessing was extended that I would be able to remain healthy with the many sicknesses around so that I would be able to take care of my family. I felt very humbled and grateful in the words that I heard and hoped that they would be true.

Now our baby is almost 4-months-old and in that time my own little miracle has occurred: despite my "big" kids getting different sicknesses four or five times each and my husband also contracting some pretty bad colds, I have been able to remain healthy and so has our little baby! I know that so many parents, despite numerous prayers, have children who still get very sick, and I feel overwhelmed that we have been blessed to avoid this trial. I know that Heavenly Father is mindful of our family's needs and has helped strengthen me these last few months.

Not Too Hot, Not Too Cold

My son is two years old. He has never been a great sleeper. He consistently wakes up one or more times a night which means I get up one or more times a night. One of the problems is that we cannot seem to figure out the temperature in his room. It's either really, really hot or freezing cold, and often goes from one extreme to the other during the night. The other night I was saying my prayers and prayed that my son wouldn't get too hot or too cold during the night. It was something I hadn't prayed for before, but I didn't think much of it.

I had been asleep for a few hours and was in the middle of a dream when I was suddenly awake and felt like I should go check on my son. It took me a few minutes to convince myself to get out of my warm bed, but I am so glad I did. I went into his room and it was very cold. My little boy had kicked off all his covers and his poor bare legs (he went to bed in shorts) were icy cold. I covered his legs with his blankets and went back to bed. He ended up sleeping through the night. It was great!

I know that my prayers always get answered, but it is such a testimony builder when something small that you pray for is given to me. I feel like this was a tender mercy given to me from Heavenly Father, showing me that he loves me so much that my simple little request was granted. Heavenly Father is just waiting to give us blessings and all we need to do is ask.

"Therefore, ask, and ye shall receive; knock, and it shall be opened unto you; for he that asketh receiveth; and unto him that knocketh, it shall be opened." 3 Nephi 27:29

Service

Recently I was talking to my brother who lives in Cleveland. He's nearly done with a master's degree and is in process of getting a job. In conjunction with one of his interviews, he, with other almost grads, was able to go on a tour of Cleveland. The tour started out like a normal tour, but then the tour guide began to excitedly point out the best bars, then men's clubs, then strip clubs. It went on and on.

My brother was in awe over how excited the tour guide and some of the other grads were. My brother began to wonder how a person can serve and make the world a better place if all he or she can think about is the next best place to indulge oneself.

In the Church, we are encouraged to serve. In fact, the leaders of our Church at every level are not paid for their service. It is all voluntary. It sometimes takes A LOT of time. But, it's worth it. Friendships are gained. Satisfaction is felt in that what we are doing is what the Lord would have us do.

I guess in a way, it's a bit of a modern utopia where we are taught to take care of everyone and make the world a better place.