Forever Families

I have two friends who have recently lost their fathers unexpectedly. One of them also lost his brother and sister in a car accident three and a half years ago. I used to shun all thoughts of losing anyone in my family- I couldn't even think about losing my husband or my son without freaking out. But, with so much death happening around me, I have realized what a fragile, precious gift life is and that it can be taken away at any moment. I have gained a much greater appreciation for my knowledge that families are can be together forever. My testimony of that knowledge has also been strengthened by those who have experienced these tragedies and have been able to go on living because they have a knowledge that their family will be together again someday. I know that I would be absolutely devastated if my family was temporarily separated, but I am immeasurable comforted by the fact that I have been sealed to my family for eternity and I know that if I live right, I get to be with them forever. "This doctrine brings a brightness of hope into an otherwise dark and dreary world." (Elder Robert D. Hales, "The Eternal Family")

Give a Care

It's a recognized fact that "children say the darndest things," likely because they see the world in such a literal way. For example, my two-year-old nephew one day overheard his dad saying about something or other, "I don't give a care." And my nephew, after a few moments went up to his dad and held out his tiny, clenched fist. Then he said, "Here, Dad. Here's a care," and placed an invisible "care" on the table for his dad.

There was a time in my life when it was safer not to care too much about things because I feared that they would be taken away or ruined. Even at a young age, I had experienced the heartache of losing things and people that were very dear to me. I deliberately walled off my heart, and was probably heard to say at one time or another that I didn't "give a care." Certainly that was my calloused approach to life for quite some time.

I remember in the early weeks of being newly married that I frequently experienced a lot of fear about losing my husband. I had opened my heart to him and had learned to care for him deeply. I could not bear the thought of the pain it would cause me to lose him, and it made me a little worried that I had let myself become so emotionally vulnerable.

Now we are expecting our first baby. And already, the intense and pure sense of care I feel for this little one is overwhelming. There are moments when I wonder if I could possibly handle any more.

The more I live it, the more my life seems to teach me to "give a care." I cannot honestly say I have completely abolished the fear of losing what has come to mean more to me than anything in the world -- my family -- but I can say that the edge of my fears has been softened by a better understanding of the gospel of Jesus Christ. I know through revelation given by God to modern prophets that "the divine plan of happiness enables family relationships to be perpetuated beyond the grave. Sacred ordinances and covenants available in holy temples make it possible for individuals to return to the presence of God and for families to be united eternally." (See also "The Gospel Blesses Families and Individuals" at mormon.org)

The love and care I give to my family changes when I remember that the relationships I develop and nurture now will last not only through this life, but also throughout the eternities. I desire to be more patient, more understanding, more helpful and more grateful.

I marvel at how rich life can be when I allow myself to care a little more about those around me. It always seems that a day is brighter when I am at peace with others in my life. Even after the glow of the "honeymoon period" in marriage has been replaced by the common tasks of day-to-day living, the sense of loving care I feel toward my husband has not diminished, but has been enriched. I anticipate the same will be true with our little baby, despite the expected onslaught of diapers, midnight feedings, and meltdowns. Opening our fists to give a "care" on a daily basis is not mundane, but is exalting. Indeed, in so doing, we become more like our Savior, whose hand, which bears the marks of His sacrifice for us, "is stretched out still." (Isaiah 49:16, Isaiah 9: 12, 21)

Mormon girl interviewed at Harvard

This is a wonderful clip of a discussion held at Harvard concerning the personal search for purpose. On the panel were college students of different faiths, including this Latter-day Saint girl, Rachel Esplin, as well as a Muslim, Jew, Presbyterian, and Buddhist. They all answered wonderful questions concerning their faith and religious practices. Rachel Esplin answers questions regarding her upbringing, the development of her personal testimony, women's roles in the church, her belief in Christ, Joseph Smith and the Book of Mormon, knowledge of spiritual truths, temple marriage, temple covenants, and missionary work. This is a great clip to see!!

Day of Faith: Personal Quests for a Purpose - 3. Rachel Esplin from Harvard Hillel on Vimeo.

Eternal Families

I wanted to write a little about eternal relationships in the Gospel in a humorous sort of way. I hope it doesn't detract from the spirit of this blog.

Evan and I just had our 9th Anniversary and he gave me a booklet of "10 Classic Love Poems" that he wrote. You can guess he had me laughing. I want to share one with you all.

Eternity - It's Longer Than You Think

My career will last 45 years which is long enough for me
I could cut it short and do something else, but I don't know what else I could be.

Raising a kid can take a score, or two if they just won't move out
But our kids are good and will want to move out unless they get sick with the gout.

But a marriage is a weird sort of thing, 'cuz if done right it will never end
And so we work and we laugh, and try to do what is right, and on each other we learn to depend.

So we've made it 9 years so far, which is 1 bizzilionth of the way
So we have far to go but I'm not concerned because marriage with you is like play

And so I think we should stick it out, it can only get better from here
Because life together is better than candy, French fries, and a six pack of beer.

I guess you have to know Evan to get his sense of humor, but I am grateful to be married to him and for the good man that he is and is becoming. I look forward to going further than "to death do you part" with him.